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Posted by Fidelity in

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Breaking Dawn 

so I just re-read Breaking Dawn (yes that is the fourth and final book of the Twilight saga) and it was phenomenal.  Yes, I do have a disease that causes me to forget everything after I've read it once/watched it once/ experienced it once... which to be honest is partly why I love this whole blogging idea because I will be able to look back on me my memories and remember.  So, Yes, I did re-read this book as if I had never read it before in my life.  As Bella experienced her first nerves and excitement to see Edward, as Bella pained and shrieked while the creature took over the inside of her body, as Bella named her first child, as Jacob experienced love loss and love gain, as a war waged.  All of it.  Yes, I was there through it all, on the edge of my seat reading through to see what would happen.  Call me crazy but it was better the second time around.  I am so excited to see how they portray this last book and it's very graphic scenes of pain and pleasure in the final movie. Ah.  Because the way Stephanie Meyer wrote it wasn't very detailed about some of the scenes but I heard that two two main characters (Bella and Edward)  want to express those scenes with more freedom because it will help show their abilities as actors.  I'm listening to the Twilight soundtrack and I'm loving it more now too.  When it first came out I wasn't the hugest fan but now I'm definitely enjoying it.  Yes, you can call me a nerd.  So what do I have intelligent to say about all this?  Well I love the strong ties between the characters of love.  They are bound by that love and it drives them to hold a higher character of lifestyle.  Which is something that I can take into my life.  Because if I really did love those in my life with a fire in my heart then that fire would overtake any other emotion I felt whether it be jealousy, anger, frustration.  

None of it would matter.  

(Therefore, I would not be sitting upstairs in my room being so solitaire 

while my family waits downstairs for me to join them).  

Rude.

Yes, I am.

BRB.

SUMMER

no responsibilities, no studying, no practice, no alarm clock buzzing. nothing but sun. fun in the sun.

yes, i am loving it.

However, I have been learning something I never expected.  And that is that- I'm learning more about myself in this week and a half then I did during the whole past year.

Something about living on your own, and not having to abide by anyone.  Me.  I got lost in the freedom of college somewhere.
And that sounds kind of surprising, even for me to say because it's not like I just went off to college and jumped off the deep end.  

No it's far different from that.  My manners, my etiquette, my respect have all been unleashed and unaware of any limitations.  It was time for me to be slapped back into reality.  I needed to remember what it was like to put others before myself and respond with the due respect that my elders and friends deserve.  I am not on a pedestal, I am not Mrs. All that and a bag of chips NOR will I ever be.  And it's time I stop acting like that and humble myself.  Before his downfall a man's heart is proud, but humility comes before honor. Proverbs 18:12 (this is where I was/am at and where I need to work to go far far from)

-on a side note. something has found its way back into my life, and I'm not sure if I'm happy or sad about this.  After a 5 month stint from coffee (since February) I had my first morning cup of coffee two days ago, and have had one every day since.  ooooo no.

Well, I'm off to scrapbook and watch another cinderella story with Selena Gomez (just to backtrack a little- dad texted me one day while I was in Athens and told me that this movie was good, so for dad to text me that I felt I must watch it- and then I saw there was dancing in the movie so it now became a mega must) ha o dad. u are weird. 

something i doodled on the plane ride from Athens, Ga to Ontario, Ca